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<blockquote data-quote="Illiciter" data-source="post: 9348" data-attributes="member: 88">lolA doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said, &quot;I don't like the looks of your wife at all.” &quot;Me neither doc,&quot; said the husband. &quot;But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.&quot; When I die I want to die like my grandfather did peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and scared like the passengers in the car with him...An old man walks into a bar, sits down, and starts crying.The bartender asks, “What’s wrong?” The old man looks at the bartender through teary eyes and between sobs says, “I married a beautiful woman two days ago. She’s a natural blonde, twenty-five, intelligent, a marvelous cook, a meticulous housekeeper, extremely sensitive to my wants and needs, very giving, my best friend, and intensely passionate in bed.” The bartender stares at the old man for a brief moment and says, “But that sounds great! You have what every man wants in a woman, so why are crying?” The old man looks at the bartender and says, “I can’t remember where I live!”A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses.She started her class by saying, &quot;Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!&quot; After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, &quot;Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?&quot; &quot;No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!&quot;</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Illiciter, post: 9348, member: 88"] lol A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said, "I don't like the looks of your wife at all.” "Me neither doc," said the husband. "But she's a great cook and really good with the kids." When I die I want to die like my grandfather did peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and scared like the passengers in the car with him... An old man walks into a bar, sits down, and starts crying. The bartender asks, “What’s wrong?” The old man looks at the bartender through teary eyes and between sobs says, “I married a beautiful woman two days ago. She’s a natural blonde, twenty-five, intelligent, a marvelous cook, a meticulous housekeeper, extremely sensitive to my wants and needs, very giving, my best friend, and intensely passionate in bed.” The bartender stares at the old man for a brief moment and says, “But that sounds great! You have what every man wants in a woman, so why are crying?” The old man looks at the bartender and says, “I can’t remember where I live!” A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!" [/QUOTE]

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