My name is Lt. I.B. Wreck and I'm putting together a special team, and I need me some collectors. Eight "I dont care what your nationality is" soldiers. Now, y'all might've heard rumors about the armada happening soon. Well, we'll be leaving a little earlier. We're gonna be dropped into France, dressed as civilians but stealthy like Ninjas. We'll meet up with Mams and Bidou there before we head out. And once we're in enemy territory, as a bushwhackin' guerrilla army, we're gonna be doin' one thing and one thing only... killin' plastic case lovin' collectors. Now, I don't know about y'all, but I sure as hell didn't come down from the goddamn Smoky Mountains, cross five thousand miles of water, fight my way through half of Sicily with Il Furiano and jump out of a ***kin' air-o-plane to teach the Amaray plastic lovin collectors lessons in humanity!
Them folks ain't got no humanity. They're the foot soldiers of a steelbook-hatin', mass murderin' maniac who loves digital copies and they need to be dee-stroyed. That's why any and every every son of a ***** we find with' a plastic case collection outnumbering his steelbooks, they're gonna die. Now, I'm the direct descendant of the mountain man Jim Bridger. That means I got a little Injun in me. And our battle plan will be that of an Apache resistance. We will be cruel to the Steel Haters, and through our cruelty they will know who we are. And they will find the evidence of our cruelty in the disemboweled, dismembered, and disfigured bodies of their brothers we leave behind us.
And the Steelbook haters won't not be able to help themselves but to imagine the cruelty their brothers endured at our hands, and our boot heels, and the edge of our knives. And the steelbook infringers will be sickened by us, and the IronPack/MetalBox lovers will talk about us, and the copycats will fear us. And when the steel haters closes their eyes at night and they're tortured by their subconscious for the evil they have done, it will be with thoughts of us they are tortured with. Sound good?
That's what I thought! Now I have but only one reWARD for a man or woman on our special team who can tell me what IB movie be it SteelBook or not in my ol' collection was the hardest for me to obtain? So scribble down your answer and don't get it wrong otherwise you won't not be allowed in this here special drawing! Now like I said I need me 8 special collectors so we'll take only 8 of you from this drawing in which you will be entered in to another contest to test your steelbook lovin' commitment to this here resistance. Good luck!
